Life as we know it...

I have not posted in a very long time and so much has changed. Shaun was offered a job in GA. He accepted and here we are... in GA. We left Anchorage the last part of August. We drove from WA to GA. That was an experience in itself.

Once we got to GA we stayed in an extended stay for about 5 or 6 weeks. 300 square feet and 5 people! You can imagine what that was like. During that stay I realized how much I took for granted having a washer and dryer that was not coin operated, a bathroom to myself, an OVEN and many more things.

Basically it was a long trip down here and it has been a long transition. Pretty exhausting but all together not terrible. We found a nice home to rent and we have a yard for the kids now. We have plenty of room for friends and family to visit (HINT HINT).

Taveon tells us he is leaving and going back to AK. Damon stares out our front window whining to go to "Day Day's home that way" and cries to see his grandmas and aunt Brandy. It BREAKS. MY. HEART. Isla, she is too little to say much but I do get sad thinking how she won't know her grandparents and aunts and uncles like the boys have had a chance to. She will know them but just not the same. I keep questioning if moving was the right choice. I mean yes we have a HOUSE to live in now instead of an apartment. We have a yard for the kids. We have nicer things and there is so much to do down here. You know what though, those are just that.. THINGS. They don't make being away from family and friends feel any better. They don't make up for holidays with family. Trick or treating with cousins. Running around like crazy on Christmas day to visit everyones houses. Can you tell I'm having one of those days? I just pray that we made the right choice.

I am unsure of the right words to explain exactly how I am feeling but you know when you are sick and your stomach is just unsettled. How you can't quite sleep because you just can't get comfortable. How even though you're an adult you just want your MOM to make it all better. My heart feels sick. So kind of like all of that but worse because there is no medicine up at the drugstore to help and no mom here to make it all better.

The most heartbreaking part of it all is seeing my kids hurt. Hearing them asking to go home and trying to tell them THIS IS our new home. Seeing Taveon sad that he missed out on hockey this year and seeing him missing his friends at school in AK. Heck, I miss his school in AK. I have to keep on the strong face for the kids but I won't feel better until they feel better. That will help me the most because that's what hearts the most. Isla obviously can not say she misses home or her family but I get so sad when I look at her sweet face and I realize she won't know her family the same way my boys got a chance to. She can't just hop on over to grandma's when she wants to.

If you're thinking I am crazy because I JUST moved and am already so homesick, well you're right. I might be a bit crazy. Being away from home, even in such a short time frame, really makes you realize how much you love the people you are missing and how much you may have taken them for granted when you were closer. I am thinking I should have done less worrying over having a clean house and folded laundry and spent more time with my friends and family. Lesson learned.

Gosh, this is such a downer of a blog. I will have to put my big girl panties on and stop moping around at some point. I wish there was a magical pill I could swallow and just BE HAPPY. I am happy but I am also sad. Now I am not even making sense.

It did feel good getting some of this out in writing.

I really am going to try to be better about my blogging and adding pictures since we are so far from home now. Also, we are setting up our webcam and skype and I am really excited about that.

Ok time to get Taveon ready for his first day at his new school. We tried homeschooling for a bit because our move was such a lengthy process but with having two toddlers , who are unsettled from a move and a momma still upset from being so far from home... it just became too much. So, his first day is tomorrow, on his 8th birthday. I may need hugs tomorrow because it's always hard sending your baby somewhere new.

If you made it to the end of this blog, God bless you <3

Amber - far from home