***excuse me as this post may be all over the place***
I haven't updated in quite sometime.
I was extremely sick with hyperemesis gravidarum (extreme morning sickness) from just before 6 weeks pregnant. I ended up with in home healthcare and a zofran pump. I was in the ER a few times for fluids.
Then at about 15 weeks pregnant I started experiencing left side pain. I thought maybe I had a kidney stone.
After 3 days of this Shaun took me in and they began suspecting I had a pulmonary embolism. So they did a ct scan followed by MRI and tons if bloodwork. Come to find out it appeared I had a hematoma in my spleen and a few cysts.
I was kept overnight and the next morning transported by ambulance to a hospital in Atlanta.
The rest is a little blurred together as far as timeline. I think about my second day there I was vomiting and suddenly started losing consciousness. I pulled the cord in the bathroom to call a nurse. A few came running in. All I remember was my vision was as if I had stared into the sun for a minute and couldn't see clearly. I could barely hear them speak. I'm not sure what all they did but this went on at least 10 mins.
At this point I think another MRI was done but I'm not positive now. They found I was bleeding into my abdomen. I was in extreme pain. I was sent for what's called an angiographic embolization. They went through my thigh to get to my spleen to stop the blood supply to it. It was then that they discovered my spleen actually had several aneurysms on it and that bleeding was from a rupture. They stopped everything off and thought that would work. My spleen should have basically just died off.
As the next few weeks passed, I was still hospitalized, I was having pain again. I couldn't eat and was put on Iv nutrition through a picc line. I was vomiting even then. I had more tests. I think 4 MRIs total and an endoscopy (where 3 ulcers were found in my stomach) I also had a small gallstone.
Eventually it was found that the hematoma in my spleen had grown. They told me I would now need surgery to remove my spleen. Being pregnant increases the risks and I was scared. They told me this is typically done by laparoscopy but I may need a small incision as well.
When they went in my spleen was far too enlarged to remove by laparoscopy and I had to be cut open. Turns out my spleen was about the size of my head. A normal healthy spleen is fist sized. I have a scar starting just below breast line down to a few inches above my navel. I was in a lot of pain. The first night after surgery the rapid response team was called into my room. I don't remember this much but my mom was there and told me. I know an EKG was performed but can't recall anything else they may have done.
Those first three days are very hazy. I know I wouldn't let my mom out of my sight. I still had the awful tube down my nose/throat to my stomach. Lots of pain. I was told by several doctors, specialists, nurses that I'm lucky to be alive. What happened to me is extremely rare and none of them have actually ever seen it.
Total I was in the hospital just under 6 weeks. During that time I am blessed that my mom was able to come down twice to be with me at the hospital. I am missing her so much and cried like a baby when she left each time.
Shaun has been amazing. He was on his own with 3 kids for 6 weeks while trying to work full time. He came to the hospital whenever I called. There were times I had to have procedures or tests and was scared and anxious and he was there for me. He found daycare for the kids. I feel very lucky to have such a great man in my life.
My last week at the hospital I think I cried daily to please go home. I was missing my babies and my husband so much. Just missing normal life.
I've been home 4 days now and I have to admit I wasn't expecting recovery to be hard. I have very little strength and have to sit or lay a lot. I can't play with my babies or clean up messes. I sleep in about 2 hour stretches. The biggest thing I was unprepared for is the emotional side of healing. I have been a mess. A big crying mess. I think a lot of it is frustration from not being able to go about life as I know it. I can't even climb my stairs without sitting for a rest. I'm still unable to eat very much at all without it hurting my stomach and causing me to throw up. The other side of it is just the trauma of what I went through I guess. I've been told its normal to feel this way after all of this. Don't get me wrong. I'm beyond grateful to be alive, to be home with my family, to have a healthy baby growing inside of me through everything. I just haven't been able to shake these blues :-(
Going through all of this has REALLY opened my eyes as to what really matters and what I need to focus on in life. I used to be so particular on my house being in order. To the point I know it was taking away from time I could have spent with my kids and husband. I never left the house without my hair being fixed, make up on, kids looking just right. Just so many little things that now I'm like how silly was that? What matters is TIME with them. Letting the ones you love know you love them. That's really what it comes down to and if anything positive came from this it is that. I see things SO very differently and I don't think things that once bothered me will now. I truly feel changed.
If you made it this far, bless you. I appreciate all of the love and prayers and kind wishes, flowers, everything I have received. I appreciate patience and support as I still recover physically and emotionally.
Love to all of you.
No comments:
Post a Comment