10 weeks pregnant with hyperemesis gravidarum

I haven't updated much because, well honestly I've just felt like absolute DEATH.
I have hyperemesis gravidarum.
It is not morning sickness. It's so much worse.
I will give you a run down of what's been happening with this.
By 6 weeks I was in getting iv fluids.
By about 7 weeks I had in home healthcare hook me up to a zofran pump. The pump requires me to stick myself with a needle in my abdomen daily so the zofran can be continuously administered to me. This has , so far, not helped a great deal.
By the time I hit 10 weeks I had been to the hospital a few more times for iv fluids and once a migraine as well. Migraines are a side effect of the zofran.

This has been such a trying time for me. The joy and happiness of a new baby is being overshadowed by this horrible illness. I usually wake up in the morning wondering how I will make it to the end if the day. I'm home with my 4 and 2 year old all day and my gosh is it a struggle!
My husband has missed work to help me on my worst days. We moved from Alaska to Georgia a year and a half ago so we have no nearby family and I haven't made many friends.

This past Monday I went in for a checkup. I no longer style my hair or apply makeup and those of you who know me know that I would NEVER leave the house without those two things before. However, it happens now and I'm certain no amount of makeup could mask how terrible I look most days. Back to to my appointment. I barely get out the door without heaving. I walk in to the dr office, blue plastic bard bag in hand. As I go to sit down I'm the waiting area I notice people staring and I mean really how could they not. I'm holding a freakin barf bag for crying out loud. Everyone else waiting looks glowing and happily, blissfully pregnant. Unaware and oblivious to the nightmare I'm living. I felt like the grim reaper of pregnancy sitting in that waiting room! I have to admit I'm painfully jealous of pregnant women who get to carry on with life as it was. Who can still clean their house, grocery shop, leave the house for more than dr appts and WITHOUT barf bags. Lucky lucky women!

At that appt I was told if my weight drops I could be hospitalized. Since we have no help with the little ones that would be devastating. An alternative and last attempt now is to have the in home healthcare company come set me up with iv fluids at home. So that's where we are at. They are coming tomorrow to start my iv fluids and in not exactly sure what it entails but I have HOPE that it will help me feel a little more human again. I means something has got to work right?

So as of tomorrow I will have my zofran pump, phenergan pills, iv fluids and lots of prayer.

I know the update isn't fun but I'm praying that in the not so distant future that changes.

We have an ultrasound scheduled for next month. Not the gender ultrasound but it will still be fun to see the baby. As long as I'm feeling a little better I won't have to cancel that appt so, fingers crossed.

I guess that's all I have for now. I don't have any pictures because I don't think you want to see this version of me! Eeeek.

First prenatal visit

Today we had our first visit for this pregnancy. We had an ultrasound and got to hear and see the baby's heart beating. That was the most exciting part of the visit. No matter how many babies you have, hearing and seeing that heartbeat for the first time is never anything less than amazing.

After that I had to have tons of blood drawn( like 14 vials) and pick up my rx for more zofran and phenergan. The dr did give me a referral for in home healthcare to set me up with a zofran pump. That is basically a pump I wear, much like an insulin pump, that will keep the zofran in my system on a constant basis. I will have to change the site on my own every other day, eeeek. I pray it helps me feel human again.

Oh!! I almost forgot. Our gender guessing so far lol. So the ring test says boy, the good ol Chinese gender chart says boy but the newest one I found says girl. The new one is where in an ultrasound prior to 10 weeks if placenta is on the left = girl and right= boy. I've had a feeling this is a boy but I could be wrong.

That's all for now but I will update again soon.

The journey to baby #4 begins

So we recently announced that we are expecting our 4th and LAST baby. I was really happy with how our cute announcement turned out and was excited to share with everyone.

The kids are pretty excited even though I'm not sure Isla truly gets it. Damon keeps waiting for my belly to get big and Taveon asked to name the baby after him.

Just last week the sickness hit me, REALLY hit me. Like a ton of bricks. I have felt like a zombie this past week. A vomiting, sea sick mess of a zombie. My poor kids haven't gotten the attention they are used to, or the dinners. I ended up getting iv fluids last week and a couple of nausea meds. Unfortunately the meds aren't doing much for me. I am not keeping much down but honestly worse than the puking is the constant nausea.

I'm REALLY missing my family and friends and actually spent my morning yesterday alternating between crying over being homesick and crying over feeling so horribly ill. I'm seriously a hot mess right now.

I'm starting back on the blog to keep our far away friends and family updated on this crazy journey. Hopefully once I feel better (pleeaaassseee be soon) there will be much less whining from me.

I have a dr appt tomorrow and I'm begging them for anything they've got to help me and this icky hyperemisis.

I will update after that.


This weeks craving : plain chicken sandwich from chick fil a!

Turtle cheesecake and memories of last Christmas

So last night I stayed up super late baking. I baked a turtle cheesecake to bring to my dr's office. No way can I keep that thing around here. Way too dangerous!!
I am going to share the recipe here:
Ingredients
Crust:

• 1 cup all-purpose flour
• 1/3 cup packed brown sugar
• 1/4 cup finely chopped pecans
• 6 tablespoons cold butter, chopped

Filling:

• 4 packages (8 ounces each) cream cheese, softened
• 1 cup sugar
• 1/3 cup packed brown sugar
• 1/4 cup plus 1 teaspoon all-purpose flour, divided
• 2 tablespoons heavy whipping cream
• 1-1/2 teaspoons Pure Vanilla Extract
• 4 eggs, lightly beaten
• 1/2 cup milk chocolate chips, melted and cooled
• 1/4 cup caramel ice cream topping
• 1/3 cup chopped pecans

Ganache:

• 1/2 cup milk chocolate chips
• 1/4 cup heavy whipping cream
• 2 tablespoons chopped pecans
• Optional garnish: pecan halves and additional caramel ice cream topping

Directions

• Place a greased 9-in. springform pan on a double thickness of heavy-duty foil (about 18 in. square). Securely wrap foil around pan.
• In a small bowl, combine the flour, brown sugar and pecans; cut in butter until crumbly. Press onto the bottom of prepared pan. Place pan on a baking sheet. Bake at 325° for 12-15 minutes or until set. Cool on a wire rack.
• In a large bowl, beat cream cheese and sugars until smooth. Beat in 1/4 cup flour, cream and vanilla. Add eggs; beat on low speed just until combined. Remove 1 cup batter to a small bowl; stir in melted chocolate until blended. Spread over crust.
• Combine caramel topping and remaining flour; stir in pecans. Drop by tablespoonfuls over chocolate batter. Top with remaining batter. Place springform pan in a large baking pan; add 1 in. of hot water to larger pan.
• Bake at 325° for 1-1/4 to 1-1/2 hours or until center is just set and top appears dull. Remove springform pan from water bath. Cool on a wire rack for 10 minutes. Carefully run a knife around edge of pan to loosen; cool 1 hour longer. Refrigerate overnight.
• Place chips in a small bowl. In a small saucepan, bring cream just to a boil. Pour over chips; whisk until smooth. Cool slightly, stirring occasionally. Spread over cheesecake. Sprinkle with chopped pecans. Refrigerate until set. Remove sides of pan. Garnish with pecan halves and additional caramel topping if desired

While baking my mind starts running sometimes. I was thinking back to this time last year. I was already baking for the holidays, like a mad woman. Little did I know that I was just weeks away from finding out about a sweet little surprise later to be named Isla :) 

On December 23rd 2009 I had my regular annual visit with my dr and to get an rx for birth control (haha). I actually did start the nuva ring that day. When I left there I just felt "off". My cycle wasn't late or even due yet but something just wasn't right. I went to the grocery store and got a box of 2 store brand tests, thinking I was just being crazy, didn't want to spend the big bucks on a better test. I went home took one and a very faint line appeared. NO WAY, I thought. So... being me, I took another. I was in disbelief. The lines were so faint they must be wrong....right? Plus I was 6 or so days away from even being due for my period. Here is a picture of that first test:

So they next day was Christmas eve. My mom was having a get together. Shaun was still at work. I went by my mom's and asked if I could leave the boys while I ran to the store for "some milk". I get there and the parking lot is CRAZY. After 15 minutes I decided I'd throw in the towel and come back another day. My friend called and said oh no you better find parking and go in there and get another test! I went around one more time and found a spot. Pushed past the crowds of crazy last minute shoppers. Grabbed a 2 pack of First response tests. I pay for them and went right to the bathroom. I took a test in the bathroom stall at the grocery store... how classy. I can still remember. It was the 2nd stall in and as soon I peed on that stick the 2nd line came up. I still remember the feeling of anxiety, panic AND excitement all at once. I called my friend immediately to get my "i told you so" from her. 

I wrapped a bow around the test. I went and picked Shaun up from work so we could head back over to my mom's. I handed him the test and I believe his exact words were "awwww damn" but what he REALLY meant was "what an awesome surprise", I'm sure of it ;)

We went back and finished the evening with family like nothing was going on but inside I was dying of excitement and nerves. Damon was only 13 months old! I tell ya, when God has a plan GOD HAS A PLAN!

We told our families within the next week with this picture:

Then if you know me... you know I had to take a few more tests to be SURE... this made it clear:

What an exciting time. That was the best Christmas present ever.I have been reminiscing about that a lot this week. So bittersweet since there will be no more babies here (I guess you never know though ;) )

 Now she's here. Safe and sound. Beautiful and sweet. We are certainly blessed. 

My first post and our Christmas SURPRISE

I have decided to finally start on my blog! Yay me, let's hope I keep up with this now.

I will give some background here since this is my first post.

Shaun and I have been married 10 years and have 2 boys together. Taveon is 6 and in kindergarten. Damon is 14 months and I stay home with him. Shaun works as a car salesman (really he isn't that bad, I promise), attends college full time and is a member of the alaska army national guard. Busy busy man.

Taveon is our laid back, sweet child. He has always been a pretty easy child. He just started hockey this year after being in love with hockey since the age of 2! He also started kindergarten this fall and so far so good!

Damon is 14 months old and a bit of a high energy little guy! He is learning to walk and loves giving kisses. He also loves climbing, jumping and getting into anything and everything! So, he keeps us pretty busy.

Shaun and I had planned on having one more baby and were thinking to wait until Damon was around 2.5 or 3 years old. Those plans were reconfigured when on Christmas eve I got a positive pregnancy tes... ok well 4 lol We are very excited but a bit nervous to have them so close since Damon is a bit high maintenance! I do know that the good Lord will only give us what we can handle though and I will have to trust in that.

I, am of course, hoping for a little princess. Guess we will find out in about 4 months! That seems so long but I am sure it will be here before we know it.

Have to go for now but I will do my best to update this blog often!